Ok, to be fair this isn't really part II but just another thought on the book, it's that good, needs more than one post.
Once again the link to buy the book Outliers is here@ amazon.com and the link to Mr. Gladwell's web site is here.
These two thoughts or theories on what childhood influences form successful adults from the book may be just givens for some parents. To others they may be like saying letting your children eat blue lizards will make their lives complete. I wish the book had came out and been required reading sometime before I was born. Forgive the paraphrasing and simplification of the ideas.
1. Support your child's interests and not only allow him time and materials to pursue the interests but actively encourage them. We all know about the soccer mom stereotype etc. but what if little Tommy would rather be rock climbing or be a watercolor artist? Soccer just won't cut it. My parents grade on this? My dad belonged to the archaeological society and I can tell you easy ways to distinguish a male skeleton from a female skeleton. My mother took me to the bookmobile. Other than that I was pretty well on my own, not uncommon in those days but I did feel neglected, what I would have given for a real library trip, good paints or a trip to a bookstore. I did better with my children, taught 4-H, learned cake decorating and taught my kids, they played sports because they wanted to, acted in plays, etc. How is the next generation doing? My daughter encourages every interest the children have and devotes her life to them plain and simple, sports, lessons, trips you name it. Are they spoiled (we are talking my grandchildren here remember?) OF course they are gloriously beautifully spoiled, are they obnoxious? Only when they act like grandma. They know they have it good and appreciate it.
2. Encourage your children to question new ideas or things they don't agree with and encourage them to discuss things with adults. I know every parent has uttered the words "because I SAID SO, that's why" but that isn't a good reason. IF your child has a thought as to why something should not be done a certain way listen to them @ least and give some weight to their thoughts. Encourage them to interact with other SAFE adults and make requests of them. Children who are taught to be seen and not heard all the time grow up to be invisible adults and even if they have brilliant earthshaking thoughts no one may ever know. Our families grades on this? About the same as previously although I'm not so sure the differences are so pronounced down through the generations. I did grow up talking to grown ups, my kids did too, the grandkids have no trouble doing so. The difference is in the children's effects on parental decisions, I had no effect, my children some, their children some. Why is this invaluable? About the age of 16 or 18 or 21 you won't be there to speak up for your children and they will need to and to adults who may not have their best interests @ heart or be merely distracted. In any case your child needs to know how to stand up and be counted with his/her Doctor, with teachers, cops, counsellors, sales people, landlords........ The more positive interactions they have had with adults the more finely honed their communication skills will be. The difference between two of the most intelligent men (IQ wise) in America is... one was brought up to question authority, he's a rocket scientist. The other was brought up to bow and scrape and get by as best as he can, he worked as a bouncer in a bar most of his life, didn't finish college because he didn't have the communication skills and basic life skills to make it all work.
Alas my life skills tell me it's time to go to bed so more on this outstanding book later.
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